With the arrival of every new calendar year comes that gaping sense of hope and possibilities, yet when you are in the midst of an infertility situation that no one (except an ever loving partner) see any chance of success, optimism is normally measured out in small doses.
This year is still in its infancy, yet so far it seems to be about endings.
Lifeslurper has a new home, the old run-down Camp Wobbles is no longer and the most enduring love of my life has gone. Both events coincided, as if to make what was always going to be a painful transition just that bit more straight forward.
Continue reading Goodbye sand dunes!
Some times I fantasize over the many luxuries it would take to make me pregnant. Sure many would disagree, feeling that regular trips to the hairdresser have nothing to do with fertility. I however, choose to differ.
When undertaking repeated cycles of IVF treatments, it is first essential to get over the idea that spending all those hard earned dollars in overcoming infertility is a luxury. Without IVF we have even less hope of having a baby. IVF treatments therefore become a necessity. One big financially-draining, stress inducing necessity. Continue reading Fantasy IVF
In the time I have spent – no, make that wasted – fighting the battle of the bulge I have done many sums. They go something like this; it is half way through the year, there are 26 weeks left in the year. If I lost one kilogram a week for 26 weeks by the end of the year I’d be 26 kilograms lighter. These sums seem to always fit in with the calendar year. They get a full work out early in the year, towards my birthday and as the year slowly grinds its way to an end. They work in half kilogram increments, from a measly half a kilogram up to a greedily unsustainable 3 kilogram a week loss. The goal of my sums is to avoid another year, another birthday, another festive season or another summer as an overweight person. Of course, anyone who has ever tried to lose weight knows it isn’t that simple. It just doesn’t happen so neatly. Weight doesn’t come off our over burdened bodies in equal amounts. Packages of times – a year, or six months is never enough time to do all we need to reclaim our bodies. If it was there wouldn’t be a diet pill industry, a weight loss program empire or meal replacement brands available at every chemist. Continue reading Weighting through infertility
The part Lifeslurper dislikes most about IVF is whatever phase of the process I am in at any given moment.
When it gets to the pointy end of a cycle, I long for those seemingly far distant times between cycles when nothing was happening. When I am heading towards egg pickup (as I am now) I longingly look back to the days of constant injection (which stopped yesterday) with a sense of nostalgia. The 24 hour wait on fertilization results seems to take as long as a course of down regulation medication. Any other time in the IVF cycle would seem preferable. Then there is the 14 day post embryo transfer wait for a blood test to see if there is any reason to celebrate. These 14 days seem endless. One day on the two week wait becomes the equivalent of one of those South Pole six month ‘days’ where there is no nightfall. Continue reading Living in the IVF moment
